Archive for September, 2009

Last Minute Homework

It had already been a busy day.  Dentist appt to replace my aging fillings, picking up Mark from preschool, soccer in the rain.

7:45 PM.  Finishing up dessert and hot chocolate, to warm up the wet, chilled soccer players.

Sam:  Ooooooo!

Me (alarmed!):  What?

Sam:  I just remembered…I have to do two science projects…by tomorrow.

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Being Three

You insist you DO NOT need to use the potty before we leave the house, only to have a DESPERATE URGE as soon as we get to the playground.

You CAN give sweet kisses, but are just as likely to head-butt.

The word you’re learning when Mama drives are still, pretty much, incomprehensible to other people.

You sing both the Spider-man theme song and the Wheels on the Bus.

USUALLY you know now not to write on the walls.  Your own body, however, is still considered fair game.

You still plead at every bath not to have your hair washed.  But you don’t scream anymore when it is.

Your Mama thinks every day that you’re really three and a half, and it’s only a few months until you will be four.

Wondermom

So a few months ago, when I was feeling really depressed about my thirteen years and counting in preschooler land, I bought myself a set of Wonder Woman underwear, on the theory that I might feel more empowered.  I don’t know.  It made sense at the time.  But the deal is, my superhero obsessed three-year old LOVES them.

Only he thinks I should strip down to the panties and cami, randomly and publicly, whenever he deems it time to fight evildoers.

It makes a certain amount of sense, if you look at it from his perspective.  HE has costumes he wears in public.  What’s wrong with MINE?

Unable to explain, I just don’t wear them.  But he’s asking, and I don’t know how much longer I can put him off.

But if he’s going to insist I run around in my underwear, he could have the decency to wait until I lose ten pounds, I say.

Dad vs Mom

Kate:   (sipping soup & buttering a roll) When DAD brings me to Panera, I only get to have a drink.

Me:  Oh?

Kate:  But with DAD’s book, you have to push a button to turn the pages.

Me (thinking to myself):  Okay, so tomato soup and bread outweighs mere soda pop, but Dad’s Kindle trumps my plain old book.  You win some, you lose some.

Mark's Gloating Little Song

Where’s Paul?

Paul’s off to school.

Good-bye, Paul!

Where’s Sam?

Sam’s off to school.

Good-bye, Sam!

Where’s Kate?

Kate’s off to school.

Good-bye, Kate!

Where’s Dad?

Dad’s off to work!

Good-bye, Dad!

It’s just you and me, Mom!

The Circle Dante Forgot

Shopping.

If my children INTENDED for me to leave the Target reconsidering the wisdom of procreation as a concept, they succeeded.  Apparently, in their heads, we shop for my entertainment, cause it’s so darn much fun to take children to the store, and if they behave very badly, Mom will get bored with it and we’ll go home.

I may recover.  Some day.

Ethics

So we’re watching NCIS this evening, and a teaser for the eleven o’ clock news comes on:  “More tonight about the first death from Swine Flu in our area!”

Paul:  “Oh, that’s bad.”

Sam:  “Why?”

Paul:  “Someone DIED.”

Sam:  “Just ONE person.”

Paul:  “But what if that one person was MOM?  Just because you didn’t know him doesn’t make him not important.  How do you think his family is feeling?”

Sam:  “Maybe he was an orphan.”

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