Archive for April, 2011

The Cat in the Hat is a Dead Man

A bloodcurdling scream from the backseat…

Me (twisting to get a view of the injury):  “What?  What’s wrong?”

Mark:  “Nuffing.”

Me:  “What was that about?”

Mark:  “Echolocation.”

Turns out that The Cat in the Hat Knows a Lot about That on PBS discussed echolocation last week…

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Combustion-based Superhero Seeks Dependable Tailor

Mark has a new secret identity.  It showed up last week when I went to pick him up from preschool.

Mark:  “I am Fireball!”

Me:  “Oh?”

Mark:  “Yeah!  I shoot balls of fire out my hands, my feet…” he pauses to revel in delicious transgression, “even out my butt.”

I think instantly of The Castle of Perseverance, Belial with “gunpowder burning in pipes in his hands and in his ears and in his arse, when he goeth to battle,” and then of the probably-related records of frequent mending of the devils’ costumes.  “What about your costume, Fireball?”

“What?”

“If you’re shooting fire out of…everywhere…won’t you burn it up?”

He opens his mouth, closes it, actually stands still while he thinks.

Yay for mom!  It’s unusual to stump Mark.

Yes, I am a bad person, feeling clever for my rare confounding of my five-year-old.

“No,” he says slowly.  “I DID have one that burned up.  But now I have a new one.  That’s fireproof.”

Well, that was a short-lived moment of superiority.

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