Me (having discovered a plop of gum on the living room floor):  “WHO HAD GUM?  YOU KNOW YOU’RE NOT ALLOWED TO HAVE GUM IN MY HOUSE!  BECAUSE THIS SORT OF NONSENSE HAPPENS!”

I round up the usual suspects.  The usual suspects, as usual, plead innocence and/or utter ignorance.

Kate:  “Not me.  I don’t even LIKE gum.”

Mark:  “I had gum.”

Me:  “OH?”

Mark:  “But not in the living room.  In the sandbox.”

Me:  “WHAT?”  (a pause whilst I think through what he said.)  “Where is that gum now?”

Mark:  “I dropped it IN the sandbox.”

Me (attempting calm, but having visions of him plucking up sand-covered gum to chew again.)  “Then what?”

Mark:  “Kate made me throw it out.”

Whew.  At least SOMEONE has developed some common sense.


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