So apparently Mark thinks Brian doesn’t know how to cook.
Me (trying to lure Mark to help with dinner): “Come on, kid, I’ll show you how to make pesto.”
Mark: “Why?”
Me: “Someday you will need to feed yourself.”
Mark: “I already know how to make ramen.”
Me: “You might want to eat something besides ramen.”
Mark: “I LIKE ramen.”
Me: “Fine. But someday you may want to impress a girl, and we love guys who cook.”
Mark: “Then why doesn’t Dad know how?”
Since I’m leaving Friday and will be gone for a week, Mark’s belief in his father’s inability to navigate the kitchen has moved from a curiosity to a source of grave concern.
Monday.
Mark: “I think we should go to the grocery store.”
Me: “Why?”
Mark: “We need some frozen dinners.”
Me: “Why?”
Mark: “So I can eat while you’re gone.”
Me: “Dad can cook.”
Mark: “I think it would be a good idea to have some frozen dinners.”
Tuesday.
Mark: “I think we should go to the grocery store and get some frozen dinners.”
Me: “YOUR FATHER KNOWS HOW TO COOK.”
Mark decides to stay silent but is obviously skeptical.
Wednesday.
[We are at the grocery store filling a prescription]
Mark: “While we are here, I think we should get some frozen dinners.”
Me: “You know, I have successfully left children alone with your father and none of them died of starvation.”
Mark: “I DON’T WANT TO DIE AND I DON’T WANT TO EAT RAMEN FOR A WHOLE WEEK. Can we PLEASE get some frozen dinners?”
