So we’re at the doctor on Wednesday…
Doctor: “Mark, um, the inside of your ear is blue.” Looks some more. “Did you put a bead in here?”
Mark (emphatically): “No!”
Doctor: “Does it hurt?”
Mark: “No.”
Doctor: “Do you have trouble hearing?”
Mark: “Yes!”
(Inside my head): THAT explains a lot.
Doctor: “Well, it has to come out. Schedule with the ENT.”
Scheduled with the ENT. (I have to type it as ENT, not Ent–otherwise I has visions of Treebeard poking twiggy fingers into Mark’s ear).
Hastily rescheduled Friday morning after a sobbing Mark called from school that the 2 PM appointment overlapped the school Halloween costume parade.
ENT: “Okay, Mark, let’s get that bead out.”
Mark: “Will this take long? The costume parade is at 2:30.”
ENT: “Not if you hold still.”
MARK FREEZES
ENT: “Oooaaaakkky. It’s crumbling, so not a bead.”
Mark (indignantly): “I did NOT put a bead in my ear.”
ENT: “I think it’s play-doh.”
Mark: “Oh. That.”
(Inside my head): The paper wad up the nose. Now this. You’re out of easy-to-retrieve-from orifices, kid.
In the car:
Me: “How DID you end up with play-doh in your ear?”
Mark: “I sleepwalk.”